Sunday, October 3, 2010

No Thanks, Spanx!

As a teenaged girl, my mother encouraged me to squeeze into a panty girdle, which was somewhat de rigueur back in the 60's. This tight contraption. which went from the waist to the bottom of the thighs, was worn under everything - dresses, skirts and pants. It smoothed the figure and eliminated bulges. It also acted as a kind of chastity belt because it was almost impossible to be naughty while wearing one, which might be why so many mothers bought them for their daughters. From the 1920's through the 70's girdles were a part of every woman's wardrobe.


You can imagine how happy I was when they went out of style, although I usually left mine abandoned at the back of my underwear drawer. Then skirts got shorter and girdles were impractical and went out of style. That's when panyhose came into fashion. Basically, they had the same function, to give women a smooth silhouette from waist to toes. Control top squeezed my middle and eliminated the jiggle but putting them on involved a death defying dance. One wrong tug and a hole or run would prove to be a disaster to this costly invention (the credit most certainly has to be given to a man).

When I moved to a warmer climate the first thing to go was my pantyhose. I love the freedom of bare legs! Sure, pantyhose hid a multitude of flaws but, hey, unless I am getting dressed to the 9's, they have taken that spot in my drawer once occupied by the pantygirdle.

And now we have Spanx! Have you tried them? I splurged and bought a pair. I went home and eagerly pushed, pulled and tugged to get it on. I tried the kind that went from just under the breast to the end of the thigh. They brought back memories of my teenage days but now there was a lot more to hold in. OK, I looked pretty smooth under that little black dress, but what would my man think when he slid his arms around me and felt this elastic armor? The very idea was an embarassment. They came off a lot more easily than they went on, and now can be found next to the discarded pantyhose.

I might have bulges and I most certainly jiggle, but I am comfotable in my skin. How about you?

19 comments:

Debbie said...

Yep I have tried spanx, and it was funny trying to get this them on and even funny when I went to the bathroom. I think the lady in the next stall thought I was having sex in the bathroom. I like my own skin, no pantie hose for me unless I am going to a funeral or something really dressy. Hey I do not think I even have any. lol

Fat Grump said...

I am in my 50s and I too let it all hang out rather than truss it up! :)

I need to feel comfortable.

I have also abandoned tights (panty hose) for the most part. I am not going to suffer just so I look good. Mind you, I don't look particularly good anyway as recent photos have revealed!:)

Oh a dilemma! You have to laugh...

Googie said...

I have tried other brands of the the same thing, and they always roll up on me when I am sitting down, or my pants will go down a litte bit when I sit and you can see them. Pretty embarrasing!!

Juli's Journey said...

I couldn't have said it better. I want to wear them just to be less jiggly and feel thinner, but I realized that I am only making myself miserable and in pain. Thanks for the post, Ellen.

Mimi said...

I have a love/hate relationship with my Spanx. They keep things looking smooth in the rear, but they make things pop out in other areas. Not good. It's really not fun to be a lady sometimes. Ugh.

Diz said...

I am NOT a fan of spanx- although I used to be. They never stay put and they're so hot (as in temperature). Good riddance! I need to be comfortable and happy too- and personally I don't think they help THAT much- no one seems to ever notice; or else they never comment on how much thinner or 'less bulgy' I look. :) But I guess people wouldn't say those things now, would they...

Lucy said...

I confess, I truss up. Love my spanx. Not for every day, but if I am frocking up, the spanx go on....

Linda Pressman said...

Ellen, you hit the nail on the head when you started talking about spanx by talking about girdles! It's just the new, evil version of a girdle because now it's not just okay that women "need" to be smooth under dresses, they need to wear them under pants, and shorts, and who knows what else. Heck, maybe we're supposed to sleep in them. Do they have spanx for my jiggly arms?

It just makes me feel that there's always room out in the world of women's merchandising for any product based on women hating their bodies. So, no, I don't wear them! If my weight is where it should be I believe that I should be allowed my figure foibles!

Honib1 said...

I ALMOST fell out of my chair when i read your post.. i really chuckled there... and sadly can relate all to well... not a fan of girdles, pantyhose spanx or anything that prevents me from breathing lol...

Lynda with a Y said...

I love spanx. It's the only way I can go bare-legged in the summer. (I hate my thighs touching!) Plus, it sucks in my tummy!

FOODalogue said...

I think it's a great marketing ploy for the manufacturers. Ever notice all the models wearing them don't actually need them? Yet I keep buying them...tops, bottoms, short legs, longer legs...and where are they? Like yours. In the underwear drawer.

Bobbie's Babbles said...

I can wear spanx for an evening under a slinky dress without feeling bothered by them. I feel good about me, but would rather not have bulges or too much jiggle while dancing. I've never been bothered by pantyhose. When I worked in the ER and wore scrubs, I always wore support pantyhose underneath in the hopes that they would reduce the chances of getting vericose veins after 12 hour shifts of standing and doing surgery. Not!

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Khris said...

I totally agree with you. Yes I would LOVE to have that smooth svelte look but I go for comfort. I just dress to cover the bulges rather than wear spanx to cover them...lol...hugs Khris
p.s. my word verification was "scant"...lol...I wonder if they know what we are talking about..lol

Enyonam said...

I couldn't agree mor. those things only cut into your skin and make you feel so uncomfortable....

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Alexia said...

you know, i find spank a bit overrated. i tried it when i was bigger and my front looked strangely flat and my back fat wasn't helped hardly at all. it looked weird to me and it kept sliding down. so i didn't bother.

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Rochelle said...

Ha - I laughed out loud when I read this...I was a huge advocate when Spanx first came out. I was so tired of the bulges I saw through my clothes, so I embraced anything that would prevent me from looking like a bowl of Jello with legs. These days, I;m much more into letting the fat fall where it may...and although it ain't pretty, it sure as hell feels a lot better than a corset made of elastic on a hot summer day. Here's to one day not having to worry about either!
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Anonymous said...

Spanx will never replace the very sexy look of a paneled panty girdle of the 60s and 70s. As a young male it was very exciting to catch a glimpse of the bottom of a young lady's panty girdle. Ah...those were the days!